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The funeral and the ceremony that accompanies it are indeed very important. For those who are left behind, a funeral provides a place for family and friends to gather for support and to reminisce; an opportunity to celebrate the life and accomplishments of a loved one; a chance to say goodbye; and the focal point from which the healing process can begin. The funeral identifies that a person's life has been lived, not that a death has occurred. It is also important to notify the community that this person has died. There are people beyond the immediate family who have the right to grieve a death. For instance, what would have happened in the United States if there had not been a funeral for President John F. Kennedy?
A funeral is the customary way to recognize death and its finality. Funerals are recognized rituals for the living to show respect for the dead and to help survivors begin the grief process.
A Funeral is for the friends and loved ones who survive. We all have a basic need to say good-bye with love and dignity. A well planned service will assist in the healing of releasing pain caused by the death. The funeral is a ceremony of proven worth and value for those who mourn. It provides an opportunity for survivors, and others who share in the loss, to express their love, respect and grief. It permits facing openly and realistically the crisis that death presents. Although it may be difficult to experience, in terms of confronting memories and emotions, through the funeral process, a bereaved family takes that important first step towards emotional adjustment to their loss.
A funeral should be a direct reflection of the person and the family. You can never say too much about the one who we gather to remember and honor. We will help you decide the type of service based on the type of person we will honor. Here are some of the things that will be considered when planning the service:
Speakers
Clergy, close friends and family members or anyone who you chose...
Music
Organ music, piano music, other instruments and recorded music can be used and combined. Selections are a very personal choice. The number of songs is not limited. You can play a favorite song or artist as the family and friends leave after the service.
Pictures
Families are encouraged to bring pictures for display at the funeral. The gathering and choosing of these pictures is a great time to remember your loved one.
Personal Items
Some people like to share a special hobby or interest of the loved one by bringing a personal item to the service. Restored cars, fishing boats, wood work, quilts, paintings and so many other items have been shared at funeral services. Each item has great meaning to family and friends and can be a valuable part of the memories one has of their loved one.
Humor
During funeral services we've hosted, we have heard many funny stories told by family and friends. Relating the humorous stories of one's life is also a way of celebrating that life.
Receptions
There is a growing trend toward having a reception after the service. These receptions are often held at a church or a family members home. This provides a wonderful time for the friends to tell the family how much the person means to them and provides one more opportunity for establishing and sharing the significance of the person who has died.
Clothing
The clothing worn should reflect the loved one. A favorite outfit or suit is often chosen. However, we see overalls, jeans, dresses, etc. If a man never wore a suit or owned one, would he want to be buried in one?
Obituary
The family will need to gather the dates and information for an obituary. Some newspapers limit the information that they will print. Ask your funeral director about the local customs.
Caskets and Urns
There are a wide variety of options available in caskets and urns. Colors, Interior materials, shapes, etc. can all express the loved one's personality.
Final Rest
There are many options to choose from. Cemeteries offer burial spaces, mausoleums, niches and more. If your loved one is cremated, you have even more choices; burial, scattering, or putting them in your home in an attractive urn. Many urns are very personal, some have matching candlesticks and picture frames.
Pallbearers
It is a great honor to be chosen as a pallbearer. Your family must chose at least six people to fulfill this task. Often family members are used. If you have more friends and family than needed, it is wise to name the rest as honorary pallbearers.
What do funeral directors do?
Funeral directors are caregivers and administrators. They are listeners, advisors, and supporters. To implement the choices made by the family regarding the funeral serives, the funeral director works together with doctors, florists, cemetery personell, casket and vault suppliers, monument companies, the stone cutter, newspapers, ministers, hairdressers, government agencies (social security admin, veterans admin, county welfare, county health departments), etc… The funeral home has a funeral director on call 24 hours a day, seven days a week, including holidays.
Does the average funeral price quoted on TV ads include cemetery expenses?
No, they only include the cost of transfering the remains, professional services for filing all the required paperwork, embalming, dressing and preparing the deceased for casketing, use of the viewing facilities, use of the facilities for the service, hearse, family car and a 18 guage casket. Vault, cemetery charges, including the opening and closing, monument and engraving, ministers, bereavement dinners, flowers, and vocalist are additional costs.
What purpose does a funeral serve?
It is the customary way to recognize death and its finality. Funerals are recognized rituals for the living to show respect for the dead and to help survivors begin the grief process.
Why have a public viewing?
Viewing is a part of many cultural and ethnic traditions. Many grief specialists believe that viewing aids the grief process by helping the bereaved recognize the reality of death. Viewing is encouraged for children, as long as the process is explained and the activity voluntary.
Is an open casket necessary during the funeral service itself?
This is a decision made by the family and often the minister doing the funeral service.
What is the purpose of embalming?
Emabalming sanitizes and preserves the body, retards the decomposition process, and enhances the appearance of a body disfigured by traumatic death or illnss. Emablming makes it possible to lenghten the time between death and the final disposition, thus allowing family members time to arrange and participate in the type of service most comforting to them. It is more comforting to see the deceased after proper preparation at the funeral, home looking peaceful, rather than they appeared at the time of death.
When you lose a loved one, taking care of yourself and your family is your first priority. However, there are a number of things that should be addressed as soon as possible. Please call us here at Davidson's immediately. Anytime, day-or-night, we are here to assist you. We will work with you to take care of the necessary details of the funeral process. Some of the services we provide are:
You are welcome to call us any time of the day, any day of the week, for immediate assistance. Or, visit our funeral home in person at your convenience.